Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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