The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
