Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He shit in the fireplace
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
