I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
