I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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