Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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