If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
