I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
