Nicole vs. Life
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
