: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
