ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
You can't special order awesome
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
