The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
