dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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