we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
