...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize