I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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