After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Welp...herpes.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
