im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
