It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize