After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
A bitchslap is in order.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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