so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
