she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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