So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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