Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
