But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
