Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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