i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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