That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
