I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I have tasted many bathrooms
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
