The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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