with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
