my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
