Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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