hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Apparently you make a good broom.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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