If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
