Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
