Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
