Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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