never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Randomize
