i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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