Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
