He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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