i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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