I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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