Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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