were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
