I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
