Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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