We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
