no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
