Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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