It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
